“The shift is overwhelming. I’m floating on a thoughtless bubble of ecstatic bliss. It takes time to grasp it, yet time has become a foreign construct and there is no one left to do the grasping.
…Tears stream down my face.
Of course, how could I forget.
I once knew this. I melt into the bliss and marinate in the great remembering.”
Thank you for sharing your remembering!!
I have experienced the BLISS too!
It is the key 🔑 to the joy 😊 I now walk through life with.
Thank you so much for the kind words 😍 I'm curious how you experienced the bliss, what triggered it, and did it feel similar to what I'm describing here?
I love to read how people get there. I found it through shrooms, writing and suffering. Not in that order. Once you get it, it's hard for it to leave, but at times we go astray, but not for long.
Incredible! Couldn't have said it better. Once you see/feel it, you can't unsee/unfeel it. You may at times forget, but the knowing will never leave your consciousness.
"Help me let go of all of it," I ask the medicine. "Take everything that’s in the way of me and beauty," I pray to the god molecule, "just take all of it." Oh my, tears streamed down my cheeks when reading this. Clearing the path is an intention I've recently approached my ketamine therapy sessions with, and it's so beautiful (is there really another word?) how these medicines know exactly what they're doing. I trust them, wholeheartedly.
Thank you for your sweet words, Derek. They do. It may take some time to trust - it is not in our nature - but I'm in awe of the intelligence of these medicines, over and over again.
I literally thought about part one almost daily. I’ve been looking forward to part 2. Thank you for sharing with us! ❤️ I hope the feeling and that awakening you experienced stays with you forever and enriches your life!
Thank you Edward!! The Buddhists would say it is not meant to stay, everything is fleeting :) But I hear you, it was a huge part of my journey and something that medicine work gifted me - moving from cognitive understanding to knowing it in the body. It makes all the difference.
Thank you so much for the kind words, Ryan, I appreciate them more than you know.
As for other writers - there are quite a few psychedelic Substacks, but most of them are more informational/journalistic. I'm not aware of any that dive into the experience itself in a more narrative form. But if you find any, let me know!
The world needs more of this literature. There so much separation and conflict right now. We need more explorers of consciousness like you Julia. It’s inspiring and impactful. You're the benchmark for this aspiring writer.
Beauty-full indeed ✨ When was this? Can you tell us more about the changes in your everyday that came as a result, or some of the Integration that you did to live consciously in accord with your realization, in subsequent posts?
I've experienced yagé but not 5-MeO. I'm curious but the collection of toad venom is unregulated and causing harm to the Bufo alvarius population, so I'm grappling with that and would prefer to find it from a synthetic source. I'd like to hear more about your experience with it
Hi Stephen. This was 2.5 years ago - and I'm still reaping the benefits from the journey. The months after it was as if I was wearing rose-colored glasses through which I could see the essential beauty in all. That effect faded a bit after a while - but it never went away. It has altered how I perceive the world in a lasting way. Due to other experiences with for example the vine, I was already quite connected to nature but this experience gifted me the capacity to draw endless wonder, awe, and joy from the natural world - even years later. It has increased my quality of life by a tenfold.
I share your concern about harvesting the toad. Opinions are divided, some say that Five is indistinguishable from the toad, others claim they perceive a notable difference. I didn't limit myself to the natural source, but my guide only worked with the toad, and it was most important for me to experience the medicine with her.
Thanks for elaborating Julia Christina, it sounds like the primary sustained state alteration was a deep connection to wonder, joy and awe spurred by your relationship with nature, which in turn had a profoundly positive impact on your quality of life. That truly sounds lovely and inspiring, thank you for sharing!
Given the connection with nature you've formed, do you find yourself curious about where the things you consume come from and the level of care of lack thereof for the people, plants, animals and land involved in making the thing available to you?
Maybe there's a conversation to be had with your guide about her method for going about getting the medicine?
Your pieces felt like a transmission and I could connect with this state in myself. My heart is full and tears were in my eyes from remembering ❤️ It was even really interesting to feel the empty void and the fear and after the breakthrough. Thank you so much, really beautiful 🫂
“The shift is overwhelming. I’m floating on a thoughtless bubble of ecstatic bliss. It takes time to grasp it, yet time has become a foreign construct and there is no one left to do the grasping.
…Tears stream down my face.
Of course, how could I forget.
I once knew this. I melt into the bliss and marinate in the great remembering.”
Thank you for sharing your remembering!!
I have experienced the BLISS too!
It is the key 🔑 to the joy 😊 I now walk through life with.
You unfolded your tale in an alluring way.✨✨
Magnificent!
Thank you so much for the kind words 😍 I'm curious how you experienced the bliss, what triggered it, and did it feel similar to what I'm describing here?
Yeah! Part 2, finally.
I love to read how people get there. I found it through shrooms, writing and suffering. Not in that order. Once you get it, it's hard for it to leave, but at times we go astray, but not for long.
Beautiful.
Incredible! Couldn't have said it better. Once you see/feel it, you can't unsee/unfeel it. You may at times forget, but the knowing will never leave your consciousness.
wow. It sounds so powerful.
I love all your writing and stories. Thanks for sharing 🪷
thank you so much for the kind words Silvana 🙏
"Help me let go of all of it," I ask the medicine. "Take everything that’s in the way of me and beauty," I pray to the god molecule, "just take all of it." Oh my, tears streamed down my cheeks when reading this. Clearing the path is an intention I've recently approached my ketamine therapy sessions with, and it's so beautiful (is there really another word?) how these medicines know exactly what they're doing. I trust them, wholeheartedly.
Thank you for your sweet words, Derek. They do. It may take some time to trust - it is not in our nature - but I'm in awe of the intelligence of these medicines, over and over again.
This is gorgeous and came at a time when I really needed it. Thank you.
Thank you for the kind words Luisa, sending love 💕
So wonderful to read about your experience. I feel the calling, I wonder if Barb would know anyone in Sydney?
Hi Amanda! I can ask her but I'm afraid that may be a bit too far from home to have any connections :)
I literally thought about part one almost daily. I’ve been looking forward to part 2. Thank you for sharing with us! ❤️ I hope the feeling and that awakening you experienced stays with you forever and enriches your life!
Wow Nicole thank you for the sweet words! I appreciate you.
Wow thank you 😉
I have gotten pieces of this through mushrooms but it doesn’t stay, not in whole at least
I know everything you said is true, but I want to know it holy physically not just on a mental level….
Thank you Edward!! The Buddhists would say it is not meant to stay, everything is fleeting :) But I hear you, it was a huge part of my journey and something that medicine work gifted me - moving from cognitive understanding to knowing it in the body. It makes all the difference.
I just love this so much. The style, the content, the subject. It ticks every box for me. This is what makes SubStack so awesome.
Are there any other writers in this space I should know about? I could literally fill my inbox with this absolute gold.
Thank you so much for the kind words, Ryan, I appreciate them more than you know.
As for other writers - there are quite a few psychedelic Substacks, but most of them are more informational/journalistic. I'm not aware of any that dive into the experience itself in a more narrative form. But if you find any, let me know!
The world needs more of this literature. There so much separation and conflict right now. We need more explorers of consciousness like you Julia. It’s inspiring and impactful. You're the benchmark for this aspiring writer.
Beauty-full indeed ✨ When was this? Can you tell us more about the changes in your everyday that came as a result, or some of the Integration that you did to live consciously in accord with your realization, in subsequent posts?
I've experienced yagé but not 5-MeO. I'm curious but the collection of toad venom is unregulated and causing harm to the Bufo alvarius population, so I'm grappling with that and would prefer to find it from a synthetic source. I'd like to hear more about your experience with it
Hi Stephen. This was 2.5 years ago - and I'm still reaping the benefits from the journey. The months after it was as if I was wearing rose-colored glasses through which I could see the essential beauty in all. That effect faded a bit after a while - but it never went away. It has altered how I perceive the world in a lasting way. Due to other experiences with for example the vine, I was already quite connected to nature but this experience gifted me the capacity to draw endless wonder, awe, and joy from the natural world - even years later. It has increased my quality of life by a tenfold.
I share your concern about harvesting the toad. Opinions are divided, some say that Five is indistinguishable from the toad, others claim they perceive a notable difference. I didn't limit myself to the natural source, but my guide only worked with the toad, and it was most important for me to experience the medicine with her.
Thanks for elaborating Julia Christina, it sounds like the primary sustained state alteration was a deep connection to wonder, joy and awe spurred by your relationship with nature, which in turn had a profoundly positive impact on your quality of life. That truly sounds lovely and inspiring, thank you for sharing!
Given the connection with nature you've formed, do you find yourself curious about where the things you consume come from and the level of care of lack thereof for the people, plants, animals and land involved in making the thing available to you?
Maybe there's a conversation to be had with your guide about her method for going about getting the medicine?
I must admit I’m a bit disappointed after Part I had me so captivated.
Thanks for being honest, Deb - may I ask what was the root of your disappointment? Plot or prose?
Your pieces felt like a transmission and I could connect with this state in myself. My heart is full and tears were in my eyes from remembering ❤️ It was even really interesting to feel the empty void and the fear and after the breakthrough. Thank you so much, really beautiful 🫂
Wow, thank you so much Sonia for the incredibly kind words. It means so much to know that you connected with it. Sending love